so explain again why im purple
no
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
