Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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