i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize