I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
