IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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