I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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