I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Four minutes until I can fart!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Randomize