He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
