cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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