I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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