I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
