Pappa wants mamma naked
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
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