BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
