Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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