Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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