This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I need a beard to bite.
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