the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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