They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
