I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize