Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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