so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
