i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize