I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The air was thick with penises
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
