I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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