She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
