Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
