once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
