I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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