P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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