I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
