Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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