Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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