oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
This is classic penis vs brain.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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