Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
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She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
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Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
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