Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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