He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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