So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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