sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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