ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
