Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
