I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
