so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
