Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
