After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
