ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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