woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize