are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
