doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Your dad touched me again.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
