one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
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