I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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