just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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